Saunter Into Singledom

There are few events that can be described as transformational, metamorphosizing, or any of those damn superlatives you can find in the good old copy of the Merriam Webster’s dictionary. Only time will tell whether I lived up to the worth of the adjectives mentioned above, but one thing is certain, I am on the cusp of a major change in my life. Thanks my dear friends for triggering the second chapter of my stint in Hyderabad, and in all likelihood the last few months of my bachelor life. 

It would have been a rather easy choice to skim the multitude of mails I get daily on the hyd-spam mail list and as I scan the roster, I would find scores of young Amazonians looking for roommates to share the burden of their expenses borne by living in a metropolitan city. But instead I chose to ignore each one of the mails and decided to saunter into singledom. It are new experiences that shape one’s life and I hope this experience of living all by myself for the 1^st time in my life at the age of 27, will truly be a remarkable and soul searching one.

I am not the kind of person who going by appearances makes X say to Y “There goes Nikhil – pretty tough egg. There are no limits to his go-getter spirit. He will dig up the sun from the east if it refuses to rise”. But my dear friends the day 3 months back exactly to this day when you decided to severe off our relationship permanently will always be etched on my memory. For a second the world lost all its light. But as the days wore on, my final appeal climbing down the throne of ego, to you to reconsider our good old days, let bygones be bygones and start life afresh, and even apologizing for the communication gap which had arisen for whatever reasons, bore no fruit, and you unceremoniously hammered the final nail into our ties of friendship. 

Your words caused me immense pain as they went down like a dagger right thru my heart. But my friends, today 3 months exactly later as I sit typing this on my laptop on the 1^st night in my new house, with New York Nagaram song fittingly playing on the background, I thank you from the bottom of my heart because but for what you have done to me, my blood would not have became thicker and skin more tougher in each of the last 90 days leading up to the final seperation. Today however Sisyphean the endeavour may seem, I know I will have the capacity to summon up the blood, stiffen the sinews and prepare myself to face the ordeal.

You may wonder why I keep saying friends, when you severed off everything and ensured that right now to forever for the rest of our lives the equation between us has in reality gone from friends to mere acquaintances. That is because I choose to sieve out the events that transpired in the last 90 days and pick the great memories we have from our 2 year MBA stint in IIFT where my mind keeps dwelling on constantly. From now even if you regret and wish to turn back the clock, the wounds to the heart you have caused can never be completely ameliorated for enough damage has been done and there is no further repair work that can be done to heal them. With this I conclude and hope to start my second stint in Hyderabad, alone and I love it.